Listening to fear led me to see Ben as an opponent, not a partner. I had to fight that internal battle to ignore fear and listen to the spirit of love so I could see, “You are not the obstacle in our marriage—you are my partner in overcoming the obstacles.”
Here’s the truth: loving ourselves is absolutely biblical, right, necessary, and possible. We just need to understand what it means and how to do it. Here are 3 steps we must all take on the journey of learning to love ourselves well:
Getting this priority relationship right is the key to getting our relationships with ourselves and others right. One of the most obvious signs that God is in our God Spot is that our relationships start to grow and flourish. Conversely, one of the biggest signs that God is not in our God Spot is that our relationships are out of order.
Some preachers discourage us from making our prayer life solely about coming to God with our “needs list.” But frankly, most of us have the opposite problem, and I think this is the main reason Jesus was so passionate about teaching us to take this posture of communication with the Father.
This shift from slavery to freedom produces radical change in our lives. When we align with the spirit of love, we move from powerless to powerful, from irresponsible to responsible, from out of control to self-controlled.
The way we end a year and begin a new year says a lot about our mindset. The unfortunate truth is that most of us end up slipping into a mindset where life happens to us, rather than us happening to life.
So lean into these partnerships. Say yes again, even when it’s hard. If you feel like you’re scraping the bottom of the barrel of kindness and grace, let God fill you afresh with His limitless love. And then be the encounter with the Father’s that the people around you so desperately need.
Our longing for true covenant love is strong as ever, but our hope to experience it has been devastated by many painful disappointments. Many of us feel deeply powerless about the future of our relationships.
Culture is never aspirational. If I want to have a culture of honor on my team, I cannot simply aspire to have it—I must intentionally create the experience of honor so that it to begin to impact the lives of the people around me.
We won’t be powerful in learning to exchange feedback until we consistently pursue growth and connection over self-protection. This is why it is critical to surround and align ourselves with people who share this goal!